Closet Megalomaniac

Everyone of us has some pet fantasy. Some fantasies are innocent, but some are downright criminal. I consider my fantasy to be megalomania, a fantasy I am proud to share with other stalwarts like Alexander (The Great one), Joseph Stalin, Adolf Hitler, George Dubya Bush, V.S. Achutanandan and Mangalassery Neelakantan.

Now I do not claim to fit into the ranks of these people, a proven deficiency in smart leadership skills mean that I would never actually wield the power to bring effect to my megalomania.

No, my megalomania is more expressed through my day dreams and for the past 2+years through my writing. No millions shall suffer, only about a few dozen hapless chaps.

Just like most momentous things in life, my association with Cybernations started on a lark in December 2007. Settling into my tenure as a CI (Chumma Irippu (Sitting Idly)) random browsing brought me to this site. A massively multiplayer online role playing game, it caught my fancy when i was looking for an alternative to Age of Empires 2, that archaic game which however was most loved by me. A purely text based game this was something I could play more safely. The embarrassment and shame of getting one's car careening off perfectly good roads and of oneself being made a human strainer mere seconds into the game can be avoided in this particular game.

Thus started an addiction that required but mere minutes per day, but every day. A new world was opened up for me, a world where inter personal relationships is the name of the game, a game where one's identity was forever replaced by a virtual alias. This association in time brought me in contact with the subject matter of this diatribe.

Cybernations Role Playing, or CNRP is an alternate history role playing timeline where we act out as nations on the world map. The geography is the same but the political and demographic pattern is entirely different. Starting from Western China and Kazakhstan , now I control India as part of the Kingdom of Cochin.

More than an year of RPing has literally been a dream come true. All my pet fantasies I have been able to portray with words in this medium. As a person with an unhealthy interest in things military, here I am able to RP massive armies, navies and air forces. I am able to create visualizations of combat scenes of my own imaginations. All the characters of my various megalomaniac dreams, the rugged and spartan General, the suave and gentleman diplomat, the wise and philosophical King, the troubled middle aged man, in short all fantasies which I dream of living I have portrayed here in varying degrees of success. Some have been downright shabby, testament to my immaturity as a writer failing to impress even my own deplorable standards of critique, but some living up to my expectations.

Now here is a coronation scene that I visualized. Of course it is downright silly and stupid, but somehow satisfying to my fantasies!

Coronation

Here is an attempt to visualize my long cherished dream of travel to Himalayas which came out disastrously. Something I started writing with lots of hopes, crashed and burned like a Chinese made fighter jet flown by PAF.

Refuge in Recluse

Another portrayal of various characters in my imagination. Again works in progress, though the commando one i liked, however unrealistic it is.

Perspectives and Perceptions

Then of course the ridiculously named Space Station and various other portrayal of my favorite technologies.

All these have been churned out to satisfy my megalomaniac impulses. Since my long dead ancestors so willingly ceded their Kingdoms to the Republic of India and since I do not deem myself smart enough to be a politician, this is the only avenue left open to me. Now for those who accuse me of plain wild fantasy I challenge them to bring forthwith any building permits required for constructing castles in the sky.

It is also an attempt to develop my feeble writing abilities. It is a part of my long term strategy of subtle sadism under which I intend to torture more and more people with my writing. Ever since this blog of mine raised some disheartening comments from well wishers, CNRP provided an anonymous channel to vent out my ideas.

A concentration of exceedingly talented and gifted writers in that community however has been successful in periodically bringing me back to crushing reality. Then of course I also try to copy from their style, forgive me lynneth, sarah and co.

Well this diatribe anyway petered out nonsensically as it was supposed to so, bye. Do read the forums where these threads lie, you may read some excellent write ups by other role players over there. Look for the above two thread starters, :)